Update

Today as I sat beside my husband holding his hand waiting for the tech to call him back for the scan I felt this overwhelming sense of feeling completely terrified. Just as quick as it came, it was gone and I knew it was none other than my God.

I am not saying that I am not scared or terrified because I am. I am just saying that I am comforted to know where my husband is going and who he will be with when he's no longer with me. I will miss him more than I can even imagine but I won't wish him back, not for him to be like this.

Today we knew would be rough. We knew the news we would receive would not want to be heard.

We arrived did the usual labs, scan and then waited for the Doctor. He wasted no time getting in the room to see us. He preceeded to explain that the Radiologist called him due to the cancer being "Considerably Worse" and she wanted to explain what she seen.

Since we are no longer doing any treatments because they weren't working to begin with the cancer to continues to progress fiercly within Richard's abdomen. He now not only has cancer in the peritneum but he also has tumors in what the doctor called the "apron" that lies on top of the intestines as well as in his groin.

The radiologist didn't mention if there was any involvement of the organs. She did mention that the chest x-ray was conclusive to that of a Cystic Fibrosis patient and that the right upper lobe was compromised and appeared to have some infection. He is now on antibiotics for 2 weeks to hopefully prevent a hospital stay.

Richard was in so much pain that he couldn't even stand for the Doctor to touch his abdomen. They have upped his pain patch, teken him off the percocet and put him on some meds that are supposed to offer instant relief. We will try this regimen for 5 days if it doesn't seem to be working we will try something else.

Doctor P. didn't mention time frames but he did tell us to just enjoy each other and our family. We plan too.

Right now Richard is comfortable for the most part. Now don't think that he is not able to do anything. He can still do whatever he feels up to doing. Driving, being a stay at home dad all of it as long as he doesn't overdue. He is some kind of awesome and I love him so very much.

Now let's get off this Debbie Downer stuff for a little bit. I got my CD with the rest of the pictures that Tonya took of us back in December today. She even sent me the outtakes. I am so glad she did they show "US" I love them all but I will just show a few to you guys. I don't want to run you off or anything.

Ok so obviously I am not quite sure what a few is. I have a lot more though so be thankful. Oh and I have one more that is awesome.

Are you ready?

You sure?

Ok.

Wait for it.

Wait.

ok here it is...

AWESOME isn't it?

I think this shall be the one I have frmaed and mounted above my fireplace.

What do you think?